Proving unseen illness in order to survive.

I have to open myself up again, for the powers that be.
I have to retell it, relive it all.
I have to prove my illnesses and disabilities, whilst fitting in the predetermined boxes – designed for some of us to slip through.
I have fallen through the lines, the pages, told “there is nothing we can do for people like you”.
“You’re too ill”.
Jumping through hoops, running up hills – against the torrential down pour of sociatal expectations.
All this is done whilst the 1%, the bourgeoisie, the privileged watch on, as they stuff their faces with our human rights.
The media uses us as scapegoats, for the ‘outraged’ to demonise us, with the misinformation they are brainwashed by – we, the ones at the “bottom”, we bring it on ourselves.
Illness is equated with laziness, disability is questioned as being unmotivated.
The seen, the unseen and no details in between.
My work is unpaid and thankless, the sick leading the sick.
I don’t want this feeling of being less than, for being unable to fit into an imaginary “type”, conjured up by able, privileged puppet masters, pulling strings, herding the “deserving” humans into their boxes, and the undeserving to their coffins.

The right to vote is great; but how about the ability? Neurodiversity

Have you ever thought of the fact that the voting system is a neuro-typical system which alienates many different people with varying abilities.

I just want you to think about this….

If you don’t have to think of how you will be ABLE to vote, then this means you are privileged.

 

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Neurodiversity is a concept where neurological differences are to be recognised and respected as any other human variation. These differences can include those labelled with Dyspraxia, Dyslexia, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Dyscalculia, Autistic Spectrum, Tourette Syndrome, Schizophrenia, Personality Disorders, Bipolar, Psychotic depression and others…

As you may already be aware if you follow my blog that I have several illnesses, disabilities and learning difficulties. As a child my neurology was always in question, with early indications of being on the spectrum as well as being a massive contradiction with a high functioning intelligence but also several learning difficulties such as not being able to read at the appropriate level for my age, having Dyscalculia and experiencing sensory overloads. My interpersonal skills were weak as eye contact was not a strong point and I did not understand boundaries like other children. When you are seen as high functioning people do not understand your difficulties as they judge and label you; lazy, disobedient, delinquent and a trouble maker.

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Read more about this HERE

Now lets get back to the topic at hand – voting.

Voting is a right which is great, many have fought to get this right from the white privileged male and won. However this does not mean that this RIGHT is made easy for everyone to obtain. My point is – many of us can’t even if we wanted to due to being neuro-divergent, disabled and ill; my issues impact all my voting options.

Lets me give you 3 examples on why it is impossible for me to vote in this neuro-typical system in the UK:

Voting in person: This is a NO for me due to my agoraphobia, C-PTSD, Psychotic depression, ADHD and OCD – the fear of people, open spaces, small spaces, germs etc… As well as experiencing extreme anxiety attacks and becoming detached and unable to hear and process information due to derealization and depersonalization Makes this scenario impossible for me to do.

Voting by proxy: This is impacted by my psychotic depression and Borderline Personality Disorder as my psychosis and delusional thinking, tells me this would be taken and used against me or that this is mind control. My mind become split and then I am trapped in a black and white world of confusion.

Voting by mail /online registration: When I am faced with forms I get something which is called sensory overload and sometimes it is so bad I pass out from it, plus I loose time regularly and get distracted on a loop for days sometimes due to ADHD. When I was able to have a social worker this would have been taken care of by them assisting me. However this service is not available to me anymore due to the area I live in.

If you would like to know more… follow this link HERE

“There is, however, an answer to this crisis.  The concept of neurodiversity provides a paradigm shift in how we think about mental functioning.  Instead of regarding large portions of the American public as suffering from deficit, disease, or dysfunction in their mental processing, neurodiversity suggests that we instead speak about differences in cognitive functioning.  Just as we talk about differences in bio-diversity and cultural diversity, we need to start using the same kind of thinking in talking about brain differences.”

(Source: http://www.institute4learning.com/neurodiversity.php)

 

Then there is the issue of voting in a system which denies your rights and leaves you to die as there is no help available, as I slip through the cracks with others; one wonders if these are cracks or specially designed filters.

Having been politically minded and active since a young age due to my French heritage and privileged education as a child and then going on to do politics, international relations and political philosophy at degree level, my awareness for the “political systems” has been of a high standard. Engaging with others to vote, political protesting, writing to MP’s and campaigning for civil rights was just the beginning in my 20’s, however as my situation grew more bleak and my interests in alternative politics and activism grew I decided after a long process to disengage with the “neuro-typical politics game” as well as the rigid patriarchal paradigm of “the ideal political structure”. Instead I concentrated on non-profit work, anarchism as a political philosophy and fighting each day to better the lives of people who are marginalised and stigmatised. This was my way of taking back the control which had been taken from me as a human being.

All I ask is that you think of this before you next judge the “non voter”, do not say things like “if you don’t vote, you can’t complain about anything after the fact” as this is a further way to silence the unheard, the people like me cast aside through no fault of our own, for things beyond our control. Try and remember that ticking a box does not give you the right to judge others, especially if this is all you are doing to create change, think of the varied ways that a citizen of this planet could help, or make a difference.

Also shaming people for not voting is ignorant, you know nothing of another persons life and why they may feel disenfranchised or due to socio-economic /class structures has been shown their voice means nothing or does not believe in the powers that be.

How about before you write your next FB status which tells people who do not vote they are stupid, or you tell those who have decided to not vote (which is their right) to keep quiet over other issues; why not take a moment – hold back and think…

Is this really the best use of my time?

Do I know everyone’s life and experiences and what has led them to this decision which is theirs to take?

And could I be a better ally to those who have no voice?

 

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I ask you to remember this when you next use a label associated with mental illness

As an activist and campaigner I fight everyday to end stigma against the mentally ill and do this as a person who has been stigmatised since being a child – for my disability due to neurological damage from trauma and my genetic neurodiversity.
When there are mass shootings, murders and acts of terrorism the common labels are thrown about. Now I can not stop people from using words which stigmatise the mentally ill in everyday life, as this would be impossible, the words which come out are often misguided or just common place. However this does not mean they do not have an affect on me, and our community.  In challenging these reactions and the usual rhetoric we must first admit that there is an issue, that words are not just words – they have impact and consequences. We must look at labelling, stereotyping, cognitive separating, emotional reactions, status loss, and discrimination. As we must do with all the diversity in the world.
As someone who is married to a Muslim, my husband and I often sit there and see which one of us will get the blame when a news report states a mass murder or a shooting/stabbing/beheading, more often than not, both of us do. A mentally ill, Islamic terrorist is normally the go to. However if the individual is white – then no religion or political persuasion is highlighted, but mental illness as a label and cause remains. None of these factors are relevant in the end, as the criminal was a murderer – a killer of humanity at its essence. Hate has no religion, disability, sexuality, gender, race – hate is hate.
However I am speaking as a mentally ill person so this is my voice and focus.

Here are some facts on Violence & mental health (from Time To Change)

Over a third of the public think people with a mental health problem are likely to be violent – in fact people with severe mental illnesses are more likely to be victims, rather than perpetrators, of violent crime

The Facts

  • The majority of violent crimes and homicides are committed by people who do not have mental health problems.
  • People with mental health problems are more dangerous to themselves than they are to others: 90 per cent of people who die through suicide in the UK are experiencing mental distress.
  • In 2009, the total population in England and Wales was just over 43 million. It is estimated that about one in six of the adult population will have a significant mental health problem at any one time (more than 7 million people). Given this number and the 50–70 cases of homicide a year involving people known to have a mental health problem at the time of the murder, clearly the statistics data do not support the sensationalised media coverage about the danger that people with mental health problems present to the community.
  • According to the British Crime Survey, almost half (47 per cent) of the victims of violent crimes believed that their offender was under the influence of alcohol and about 17 per cent believed that the offender was under the influence of drugs. Another survey suggested that about 30 per cent of victims believed that the offender attacked them because they were under the influence of drugs or alcohol. In contrast, only 1 per centof victims believed that the violent incident happened because the offender had a mental illness.
  • Contrary to popular belief, the incidence of homicide committed by people diagnosed with mental health problems has stayed at a fairly constant level since the 1990s
  • Substance abuse appears to play a role: The prevalence of violence is higher among people who have symptoms of substance abuse (including discharged psychiatric patients and non-patients).

Reporting stories featuring violence and mental health problems

  • stick to the facts – don’t speculate about someone’s mental health being a factor unless the facts are clear
  • consider including contextualising facts about how very few people with mental health problems are violent
  • seek comment from a mental health charity such as Mind or Rethink Mental Illness
  • speak to the perpetrator’s family – often they are victims too with compelling stories to tell

So I ask you to remember this when you next go to use a label associated with mental illness / disability / neurodiversity:
When YOU use the words: nut-job, psycho, maniac, crazy, insane, psychopath, nutter… to describe criminals and their actions YOU put us back in the dark ages.
When YOU associate mass murder with mental illness you demonise us.
You put me and others in danger.
You isolate the already isolated.
You cause further illness to us.
You criminalise us, which we have been fighting to end since the asylums closed.
You excuse hate and name it “mental illness”.
You echo the rhetoric of the far right, the fascists, the eugenicists, the people who have robbed us of our humanity and freedom, the people who want us destroyed.
You take away our civil rights.
You hand us the knife, the noose, the pill bottle.
You are part of the problem and YOU need to STOP!
Also:
Could non disabled / neuro-divergent / mentally ill people
STOP speaking for us!
Stop pushing us down with your privilege!
Stop telling people how “we” feel.
Be our allies – support us, just DON’T speak for us.

neurodiversity
Charlotte Farhan Quote