Between States – Poetry by Charlotte Farhan

Safe Place - By Charlotte Farhan — Safe Place – By Charlotte Farhan

Between States

Closing my eyes,
seeing emptiness, however endless,
hearing sounds of days already had,
voices of lonely goodbyes.

In cornfields we escaped,
laying in beautiful memories beneath future possibilities,
Time is only relevant to my existence,
numbers, hands, faces – clocks stop.

Pendulous over my metaphorical cliff.
Blue surrounds me,
mist kisses me as tears precipitates,
waves crashing below.

Dreaming takes forever,
passing hours – drifting.
Life tries to wake me with flickers of light,
clasping tightly at the reigns of this delusion.

The breeze carries a scent with it,
brushing my hair against my face,
familiarity sinks into the pit of my stomach,
I know this place.
This residence has no name,
no directions given, or maps written.
Stepping through a cerebral maze,
with the house getting further away.

This world between states,
of mind and power.
My consciousness hesitates,
not wanting to let me go.

Between States - By Charlotte Farhan — Between States – By Charlotte Farhan

Art and Poetry by Charlotte Farhan

If you have any questions please do not hesitate to ask by filling in this form:

Proud to Announce my New Art Residency at OTV Magazine

Here is what OTV had to say about me and my new position on the team…

Open Thought Vortex is happy to announce Charlotte Farhan as our Artist-in-Residence for the summer of 2016. Charlotte is internationally recognized as an artistic ally. She runs the non-profit Art Saves Lives International Magazine which seeks out and promotes artists whose work raises awareness for such topics as mental health, domestic violence and survival.

Charlotte works tirelessly to expose the underbelly of the ableist hierarchy both through ASLI and through her own art which chronicles her survival of abuse and assault. Like our previous OTV Artist-in-Residence Aaminah Shakur, Charlotte’s art is expressed through multiple mediums. Her path to wellness is paved with paintings and her writing and art have opened doors for hundreds of others worldwide to speak up about their own survival.

We are very proud to have Charlotte as a member of the OTV team. We look forward to showcasing her talent and collaborating with her on projects that serve the overlapping missions of Open Thought Vortex and Art Saves Lives International.

OTV was created by Shareen Mansfield who is founder and publisher and Shawna Ayoub Ainslie who is co-founder and editor in chief.

As well as artist in residence at OTV, I am also a regular contributor as a feature writer.

Here are my latest articles:

As A Victim I Survived – By Charlotte Farhan

How Art Brings Me Joy – By Charlotte Farhan

And here are my two accompanying art pieces for these articles…

As A Victim I Survived - By Charlotte Farhan — As A Victim I Survived – By Charlotte Farhan

otv Laughter by Charlotte Farhan — Laughter by Charlotte Farhan

Please visit Open Thought Vortex (OTV) Magazine and subscribe by clicking HERE

Art and Poetry – Alien Woman by Charlotte Farhan

Alien Woman by Charlotte Farhan

She was thought to be different from an early age,
no one understood her language or seclusion.
Being made to witness their madness on a rampage,
their sadness transparent – was she the intrusion?

When looking up at the stars she could see her home,
the planet she was created on – was so far from here.
Abandoned, dropped in a deep-sea of monochrome,
swimming to the ragged shore – a reluctant sightseer.

A heart larger than most – with beats like a bass drum,
She fights the worlds battles – a leader with forlorn hope.
Her voice soothes you – allowing you to overcome,
Eyes so open they see like the Hubble Telescope,

As an alien she lives amongst us in vibrant blues,
she disguises herself as she waits in purgatory.
Her hope is to free this earth of beliefs disabused,
Your life is fragile – never forget; memento mori.

If you have any questions on my work, if you wish for me to exhibit in your gallery or would like to purchase a piece , please contact me via the form below, thank you.

Art Spotlight – Bad Child Crazy Girl – By Charlotte Farhan

Acrylic paint, oil pastels, pen, nail varnish and charcoal. Size: A4, Canvas Paper.

To find out more about this painting and the motivations behind it, please follow this link:

Being “bad child – crazy girl” in neurotypical education structures – the struggle for equal rights!

For information on prints, original artwork or any questions please fill out the contact form:

Art to End the Silence on Rape – I Am Still Bleeding

This painting and poem is from my upcoming exhibition; which tells the truth about my rape and sexual abuse, through visual art, poetry, shadow boxes and my story; my hardest and most painful work to date.

With therapy this process of healing is ongoing, these pieces of work which are still being created and crafted are a way for me to understand, cast out the nightmares which have convoluted my reality, addressing the issues victims of sexual violence (like myself) have to face in today’s world which is heavily influenced by rape culture and victim blaming.

Sharing selected pieces of visual art and poetry (such as these below) before my exhibition is launched is to reach audiences far and wide.

Sexual violence is not prejudice it can happen to anyone. This exhibition is for us all, women, men and children from every ethnicity, social background, sexuality, religion and lifestyle. With doing this, the hope is to give us a voice to tell those who have abused and violated us that we can take the power back that was taken from us, to tell those unaffected how our lives are a daily struggle and to tell the world that there is still so much to do, so that we can end sexual violence for good.

My power was taken.

I am affected.

My life is a daily struggle.

I am a victim and I am a survivor.

I Am Still Bleeding – By Charlotte Farhan

When you look at me you don’t see blood

my violated self concealed

words which remain misunderstood

as if my sex had been revealed

not a little girl but forced womanhood

left feeling helplessly desecrated

as I had been in early childhood

forsaken; flowerless and humiliated.

–

Maybe you saw me as a flower bud

not pretty; but ripe and eager to grow

violently picked and dragged through mud

grappling innocence; never to let go

my tears washing my shame in a flash flood

not knowing; if there will be a tomorrow

now reminded of the intrusion by my menstrual blood

in a world with no desire to know.

If you have any questions about this painting, poem or the upcoming exhibition, please fill in this form:

Art Spotlight – Vulnerability

Vulnerability – By Charlotte Farhan

This piece of art represents the cognitive vulnerability of abandonment in early childhood.

The figure is genderless and ageless, almost fetus like, with an adult sized body; however retaining a childlike energy conveyed by the rough scribbles and marks made around the figure.

The colours remain playful, yet remind me of a false sense of safety and the forced love which was present in my visual world as a child.

The coarse oranges, cold blues and gender repressing pinks all mixed in with the greyness of the 1980s.

Reminding me of my plastic toys which were my main source of comfort as well as the adult world I was fully submerged in where I was a plaything, a doll or an inconvenience.

The cold as stone faces became distorted shapes and the words which hurt my childlike naivety (which should not have been heard) felt like tiny knives piercing my thin emotional skin.

This piece of art was created on emotional impulse.

A way to express myself through this period of time where I am exploring my childhood in hope of aiding my recovery and management of my mental illnesses.

A way to raise awareness, to allow for a visual representation to be seen by others.

I know I am not alone in this experience.

I would like to invite you as a reader of this to share any kind of creativity you choose to express yourself through. Contact me or visit my nonprofit Art Saves Lives International and send us a submission and we will share your expressions with others, with the hope of us all using creative outlets to communicate difficult and important subjects.

ART CREATES CHANGE!

ART CAN HEAL!

If you are interested in this artwork for your collection, for an exhibition, charity event or would like to buy a print, please use the form below:

PTSD AWARENESS ART – Pain and Detachment – By Charlotte Farhan

Pain and Detachment – By Charlotte Farhan

The pain from post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) infects the mind like poisonous thorns and then to alleviate the suffering the mind detaches into a dissociative state. Leaving reality and separating me from the real world.

The PTSD I suffer with is due to childhood abuse from a family member and is also due to being raped at 15 violently.

PTSD is often only associated with war veterans, but many other traumatic events can cause this. Rape, sexual violence and domestic violence victims are a very high percentage of sufferers.

Some Facts on Rape

“Globally, about one in three women will be beaten or raped during their lifetime. About 44 per cent of all UK women have experienced either physical or sexual violence since they were 15-years-old. Britain ranks among the worst countries in Europe when it comes to women being violently abused.”

“1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime (14.8% completed rape; 2.8% attempted rape).“

“The most recent UK government statistics estimated about 78,000 people in the UK have become rape or attempted rape victims, and about 9,000 are men. Research suggests that the notoriously low report rate is particularly true among male victims. About 1,250 incidents of male-victim rape were reported to the police in 2011-2012.”

“The year in a male’s life when he is most likely to be the victim of a sexual assault is age 4. A female’s year of greatest risk is age 14.”

“Approximately 4/5 of rapes were committed by someone known to the victim.”

For more info visit RAINN and Rape Crisis England and Wales

If you have PTSD or suspect you have find out more here and how to get help.

If you are interested in this artwork for your collection, for an exhibition, charity event or would like to buy a print, please use the form below:

I Ripped out my Heart – By Charlotte Farhan – Art and Poetry

I Ripped out my Heart – By Charlotte Farhan

I couldn’t feel anything today,

not one feeling was felt,

shadows of the world like ghosts,

haunted memories locked in,

set to continuously replay.

Desolation in my mind created an echoing sound,

my thoughts rattled in my head like pennies in a box,

my emotions running like deer on a hunting ground.

I slowly began to itch the itch,

the one burrowing into my thorax,

the one which seemed neverending like a bottomless ditch.

Ripping into my torso,

hacking at my ribs as if they were a rotten enclosure.

I started to pick away at my flesh,

trying to get to the prickling feeling deep inside,

pulling up my lungs as if they were a bloody mesh.

My chest felt tight and the constrictions of my rib cage felt like a prison,

All my thoughts turned to the release I would feel if I just reached inside,

my blood is beautifully glistening the purest crimson.

Soon I heard it,

the deep thumping of my heart,

burrowing deeper my hand suddenly felt it,

pulsating in my grip.

The feeling is like none experienced before,

the more I squeezed the better it felt,

as if I were the captor and it my prisoner of war.

Wanting to never lose this awareness of self,

never wanting to abandon my own heart,

like so many had done before,

debasing me and tearing me apart.

I started to slowly haul it out of my cavity,

the ripping was glorious,

the pain was euphoric,

lost in depravity.

Eventually I was left with my heart in my hand,

as it beat its last beat,

the emptiness returned and the emotions stopped,

holding my heart closer,

I began to deplete.

Just me and my heart,

together at last,

no longer spare parts.

Never letting it go,

never losing my grip,

seeing myself lying below,

the nothingness began again,

the waves of time smashed me into unconsciousness,

I became an abandoned ship.

If you are interested in these artworks for your collection, for an exhibition or would like to buy a print, please use the form below:

Art Spotlight – Agoraphobia – by Charlotte Farhan

Agoraphobia – By Charlotte Farhan

Living with agoraphobia is like being a caged animal who fears its capture and environment. My mind passes back and forth and my panic increases with everyday that passes. Daily events round the world confirm the need to be locked away, for my own safety and sometimes others. On occasion certain parts of my mind wish to escape the confinement the agoraphobia has created, parts of my other illnesses such as my borderline personality disorder and psychotic depression bash their metaphorical heads against the bars of my prison. This illness is the child of my post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), from trauma comes anxiety and this ultimately changed my entire behaviour and personality.

We have long observed that every neurosis has the result, and therefore probably the purpose, of forcing the patient out of real life, of alienating him from actuality.

(Sigmund Freud)

If you are interested in this painting for your collection, for an exhibition or would like to buy a print, please use the form below:

Read about my struggles with agoraphobia and share them with a friend, help me raise awareness and end stigma toward mental illness.

The Agoraphobic Artist – My Story

The Agoraphobic Artist – How I live in the captivity of my mind

Art Spotlight – Female War – By Charlotte Farhan

Female War – By Charlotte Farhan

This Depicts The Want For Freedom For Women.

From The Rigid Gender Roles That Society Has Imposed Upon Us.
Our Gender System Has Created Oppression And The Female War Has A Mission To Overthrow This System By Any Possible Means.

We Believe That We Must Wage A War Against Patriarchy And The Gender System Which Confines Us To These Rigid Social Roles.
The Domination Of Women Is The Oldest And Worst Kind Of Oppression In The World. This Is Because It Spans Across The World Oppressing Women Of Different Races, Ethnicity, Classes And Culture.

Female War - By Charlotte Farhan — Female War – By Charlotte Farhan

“As Anarchism Is A Political Philosophy That Opposes All Relationships Of Power, It Is Inherently Feminist”

(L. Susan Brown)

If you are interested in this painting for your collection, for an exhibition or would like to buy a print, please use the form below:

Between States

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I Am Still Bleeding – By Charlotte Farhan

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Vulnerability – By Charlotte Farhan

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Pain and Detachment – By Charlotte Farhan​

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I Ripped out my Heart – By Charlotte Farhan

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Agoraphobia – By Charlotte Farhan

We have long observed that every neurosis has the result, and therefore probably the purpose, of forcing the patient out of real life, of alienating him from actuality.

(Sigmund Freud)

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Like this:

Female War – By Charlotte Farhan

“As Anarchism Is A Political Philosophy That Opposes All Relationships Of Power, It Is Inherently Feminist”

(L. Susan Brown)

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Pain and Detachment – By Charlotte Farhan