Category: My ongoing recovery

Infertility gave me the chance to question my abilities and accept being child free

Infertility by Charlotte Farhan

(Please be aware that this essay is my opinion and represents my life. In no way am I judging anyone for their life choices with this piece)  Being child-free was not my first choice; like most people the indoctrination of the projected ideal of…

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A Kind of Healing – Art and Poetry By Charlotte Farhan

A Kind of Healing - By Charlotte Farhan

  A Kind of Healing – By Charlotte Farhan – smoke into the night smoke into the morning remove feeling numb a kind of healing – memories clutter dreams smudge nightmares form creating other worlds mirrors reflecting the storm – shackled to distraction narratives…

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This is how it feels to be the child of a suicidal parent

Make it Stop - Art and Poetry by Charlotte Farhan

There hasn’t been a day since being 11 years old that I wasn’t prepared for my Mother to die. There is no scenario in which my mind has not investigated or planned; from her funeral, what I shall say, how I will feel, who…

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Our Journey so Far – Me and my Psychiatric Assistance Dog

me and amadeaus - by charlotte farhan

  This is our journey so far… Amadeus is a 13 month old standard poodle who is my psychiatric assistance dog and he is helping me gain some independence, access to the outside world, exercise and he also gives me things I can not…

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“I am Fine” the mantra of unseen illness – By Charlotte Farhan

I am fine…. I AM FINE! I. AM. FINE.  However which way I say these three words they are always a lie. Not a vicious deceitful lie, but a lie which serves me well whilst simultaneously crushing me emotionally; with each utterance. This little…

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Everyone is Watching – Art and Poetry By Charlotte Farhan

Everyone is Watching - By Charlotte Farhan

With this unseen malady, the world is set to a different frequency, faces move past with only apathy, when they can’t fit you into a box, intelligent, irrational, focused, erratic… you seem a paradox. Knowing people question me, life feels scrutinised, under the microscope,…

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Where are my human rights? Mental illness in the NHS

tears by charlotte farhan

Over 3 weeks ago I wrote an open letter to the NHS and the Adult Mental Health Services:  https://charlottefarhanartactivism.com/2016/09/06/open-letter-to-the-mental-health-services-england-nhs/  Since this letter things started to look up, after tweeting my desperation and crisis live to the world and my followers, the NHS services in…

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Make it Stop – Art and Poetry by Charlotte Farhan

Make it Stop - Art and Poetry by Charlotte Farhan

Waking up, whipping eyelids open in panic, heartbeats pound at my chest, a frame of mind completely manic, inside is emptiness, depressed, with nausea rising as if volcanic, anxieties flood and infest, unwanted thoughts, borderline satanic, the compulsions arise, obsessed, a lump in my…

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Time to Breathe – Art and Poetry By Charlotte Farhan

Time to breathe - By Charlotte Farhan

Time to breathe is a luxury, many do not have the privilege, a condition for recovery, confused often with forgiveness. Time ticks faster – lungs clench, pressure mounts further inside, enemies to avenge, memories like cyanide. There is no freedom from this tyranny, like…

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Open Letter: To The Mental Health Services England (NHS)

Charlotte Farhan - Open letter to NHS

Dear Mental Health Services England (NHS) I am writing to you as I have lost the will to fight for my life and am using my last amount of strength to share my desperate situation with you. I suffer from: complex post traumatic stress…

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